iGreed
It was heralded at a press conference months before its arrival, this thing, this gadget that would surely change the world. The Wizard of Apple, Steve Jobs, appeared before a giant media screen in a setting Hollywood might use to satirize a super-chic, self-important company and foretold of this gadget’s wonders. Oh, the capability you’ll have: the hours of Internet surfing, video games, movies, music and the ability to receive emails in the middle of cocktail parties and dinners with friends. And just think of the texting possibilities! It was coming he told us, so be prepared. It was coming and the dawn of a new day was upon us. And then, before God and all humanity, he revealed to us the future: the iPhone.
The months of anticipation that followed were heady times indeed. There was a constant buzz heard round water coolers across America; endless speculation of how lives would change, battles would be won and strides for the good of all humanity would be made. But alas, this thing, this iPhone, came with a price. And how to pay for it? Sacrifices would have to be made, credit cards maxed out, lattes rationed for emergencies only and hopes for little Billy’s college education dashed. After all, revolution doesn't come cheap. Advancements for humanity cannot be found rummaging through bins in bargain basements. When the countdown for the new arrival reached single digits, the most staunch followers of Apple, the ones who learned to compute on a Macintosh, stood by it through the dark days of PC domination, saw the light at the end of the tunnel with the introduction of the iMac with its retro design, were among the first to own an iPod and with no apparent job security to worry about, began camping out on street corners outside Apple stores, well stocked with provisions and lawn chairs to brave the elements and be among the first recipients of this gift from the future, this iPhone.
When it finally arrived, there was much joy in the land! Except for those who waited in ques and still went home empty handed, and some who did manage to get their hands on one of the precious gizmos ended up selling them on Ebay for twice the price. Oh, and didn't we tell you that the $600 price tag doesn't include any kind of service agreement. Yeah, so, if you want to actually use your iPhone, it’s going to cost you extra, not to mention the fees you’ll probably have to pay for canceling your old service agreement. Sorry about that. So, many friends I know and Apple die-hards postponed their purchase of the iPhone until their cell service runs out or until the price comes down a little or they start making more money.
And then, in the worst marketing decision since New Coke, Apple reduced the price of their precious iPhone by $200 just months after introducing the product prompting thousands of angry emails and customer outrage from those who paid full price. It adversely affected the company’s stock and cost them thousands in refunds and rebates and an apology from the man himself, Steve Jobs. Also, with this stunt they may have sacrificed one of Apple’s most bankable assets: customer loyalty. If the iPhone had been priced correctly to begin with instead of so out of line with other PDAs, they might not be in this mess now. Also, aren't we tired of being jerked around by this kind of "gotta have it" marketing with new generations of a product planned out ahead of with the goal of rendering the original device obsolete with a year or two? Come on. Aren't we smarter than this?
Labels: Computers, Consumerism, Corporate America, Pop Culture
Please Stand By...
Just to let you know, I'm still waiting for my new hard drive from Dell and consequently am still without access to my regular computer. As soon as it's back up and running, I'll have posts-a-plenty. But for now, please stand by...
Labels: Computers
Poor Jud Is Dead
I regret to inform you that my hard drive was pronounced dead last night at 8:41 PM by an Eastern mystic in India who works for Dell Technical support. My hard drive had a near death experience back in February, but thanks to another Eastern mystic who performed an extraordinary feat, what amounted to the equivalent of a Hail Mary pass, my hard drive was saved and we were blessed with another four months together.
Another blessing that came out of the February experience was the lesson I leared in backing my hard drive. Once my computer was revived I ran out and bought an external hard drive, backed everything up for the first time in my life and copied all my photos to CD. I stand to lose very little this time around and not anything of great importance. Thank God.
Replacing my hard drive apparently is a very simple and inexpensive procedure. So I ordered a new one from Dell. In fact, it's 10 GBs bigger than my old one but is still the smallest one they make. The most upsetting thing about this entire experience though, is that it's going to take Dell a week to ship the new hard drive and should arrive around the 16th. So I will be without a computer for 10 days. 10 DAYS! Why don't they just cut off my right arm while they're at it? I let the sales department at Dell know in no uncertain terms that in this age of overnight shipping having to wait 10 days for an item that is in stock is unacceptable. They may just lose my business to Circuit City. We'll see. I'm still in shock from the loss.
There will be a small memorial service once the old hard drive is removed. In lieu of flowers please send donations for a new computer.
Labels: Computers
Excuses, Excuses--and a couple of rants.
Hello. Remember me? I know. You probably thought I’d dropped off the face of the earth leaving Judy’s funeral as my swan song on this blog thingy, but not so. As the incomparable Elaine
Stritch once slurred "I’m still here."
So just where have I been? It’s a combination of things, actually. First, things are getting busier at my day job which is totally cutting in on my time to both read all of your blogs and write my own. (I can’t be expected to do this thing for free, you know.) There have also been some personal business issues of my own which are too boring to mention here except to say they are clouding up my good brain cells and stifling my creativity. Second, after my Italian vacation an ever demanding social life has kept me away from the computer and out in the real world–"
heigh ho the glamorous life!" (That’s two Sondheim quotes so far if you’re keeping track.) Third, I’m not feeling it lately. The post ideas are just not coming. I've started to write several this week, but without any real inspiration I just end up rambling. These half-written posts linger in unpublished Blogger limbo while I lack the discipline to just sit down and "finish the hat." (And that’s THREE for a "hat" trick, ladies and gentlemen–get it? Hat trick? Okay, that one was a bit forced, but bear with me, I’m suffering from a lack of creativity here.)
And the number one reason I haven’t been posting is: My computer sucks! It’s been slow and crashing a lot lately. The hard drive is almost full of ever-important documents like memos from a job I left a year and a half ago, contracts for weddings I did three years ago, and countless bad photos which seemed like a good idea at the time thanks to the convenience of a digital camera that allows me to snap away at anything without the limitations or good judgement imposed by a roll of film. I really shouldn't complain though. This laptop has lasted me, with little incident, for three and a half years, which in computer land puts it on a technological par with the gramophone. I’m due for a new computer, I know. But I’m a technophobe and fear change. So there you have it. (FYI–during the course of writing this post, my computer crashed yet again. Thank god for automatic timed saves.)
Oh yeah! And another thing! My lousy monopoly-owned Time Warner Internet connection just cuts out for no apparent reason for anywhere from 3 minutes to up to, say, 5 hours or so. This has been an intermittent problem since the beginning but has been much worse this past week. "Every day a little death." (4!) By the way, there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. Time Warner owns all the cables in New York, so even if I choose another company (and I have–my connection is
Earthlink, but in name only) it all runs on the same lousy, Time Warner, we-don’t-give-a-damn lines and gets paid on their bill. It, too, cut out during the course of writing this post.
Anyway, that's my story. Sorry I've been away.
Labels: Blogging, Computers, Consumerism, Corporate America
Too Much Information
When
Google Earth first launched I was a little shocked at the stunning clarity of the images and details of landmarks, buildings and businesses that could so effortlessly be accessed by anyone with a computer and a cable modem. Recently I've read on a couple of
other blogs that I'm not alone in my concern that this information can easily be seen by just about anyone.
So, it was only a matter of time before we read
something like this:Four men have been charged with conspiring to blow up jet fuel supply tanks and pipelines at John F. Kennedy International Airport...Officials said the "defendants obtained satellite photographs of JFK airport and its facilities from the Internet and traveled frequently among the United States, Guyana and Trinidad to discuss their plans and solicit the financial and technical assistance of others."
Well who didn't see that one coming?
Labels: Computers, Current Events
The Dazzling World of Mac
Brunch in
SoHo, sounds enticing, right? I thought so, too. Scott convinced me that there was a restaurant, a one,
Great Jones Cafe, worthy of taking 2 trains more than 100 blocks on a 30 degree day just for the
andouille sausage, eggs and New Orleans style grits. A recent Mac convert and since we were in the neighborhood and all, Scott first suggested that we pop into the
Soho Mac store.
The visit was strategically timed on the heels of my hard drive woes as I
teeter on the great divide between Mac and PC. Now if Mac is hip, then Mac in
SoHo is hip to tragic proportions. And I'll admit--the store is impressive. A grand staircase of
Lucite stairs (I snapped the photo myself) seems to transport one to a futuristic white plastic world where everyone wears black t-shirts. At the top of the stairs is a giant screen with theatre style seating, a kind of church where one can witness conversions from old PC users to new Mac die
hards. There are rows of
ipods, sound docks and laptops, one more shiny than the next. Oh, how they gleam! And then you look at the price tags.
I don't care how sleek and trendy they are, the Mac laptops cost upwards of $500 more than PCs with essentially the same capabilities. And if you want a black laptop as opposed to what I guess is considered the less desirable white, you'll pay $300 more for one that has the exact same guts. So, sorry Mac, but I'm going to need a little more convincing, I'm not buying your brand of crazy today.
After our little shopping trip, my blood sugar was so low I gobbled up my New Orleans style brunch in record time. It was
de-
lish and admittedly, worth the trip.
Labels: Computers, Consumerism, Corporate America, NY Restaurants
Crisis Averted
You may have been wondering where I've been the last few days. I wish I could say somewhere warm (it was 18 degrees here today), but alas, no. I've spent the better part of the last three days on the phone with Dell tech support dealing with the death of my hard drive, its restoration, near death experience, emergency surgery, recovery and finally, the purchase of an external hard drive--something I should have done years ago. I wonder if any of this has anything to do with those cracks I made about Microsoft the other day.
Well, I won't bore you with the details. It has a happy ending in that I didn't end up losing anything, but it was quite a headache. Thanks to one very dedicated tech support guy somewhere in India who performed what might be the equivalent of bypass surgery on my computer, it survived.
Labels: Computers
In Honor of Microsoft's Vista
My Dad sent me this. (below) It makes a pretty good argument for switching to a Mac but I hate change. I only switched over to the "new blogger" the other day and I think they tricked me into it. Now I have problems with paragraphs--any one else experience that? I have to do my posts in Html to make it work right. I hate Html. Happy Wednesday. Enjoy!
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon." In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........ Twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off. Please share this with your friends who love -- but sometimes hate -- their computers!
Labels: Computers, Consumerism, Current Events, Humor
We don't need no steenkin' computers
Here in New York I'm lucky enough to get to vote in one of those old fashioned voting booths. You know the kind I mean--a gigantic iron lung of a machine with gears and levers and a privacy curtain. It's the same kind pictured in the School House Rock cartoons of 1920s suffragettes voting for the first time. Indeed their design dates back to that era. Supposedly they jam easily and there are no companies left who manufacture spare parts to repair them, but still there is something that feels secure about them. No hanging chads, no corrupt Diebolds machines.
When you enter the booth, you pull a huge red lever the size of an eighteen-wheeler gear shift from left to right which causes the privacy curtain to close with a squeak. Then you review your candidate choices pulling a lever for each one where a huge "X"slides into place next to their name. If you change your mind, you just push the lever back to its original position and the "X" disappears. Makes sense, right? Once you've pushed all the levers for your candidates of choice you once again slide the huge red gear back from right to left this time. And with the mechanical din of gears shifting into place and the smell of freshly oiled cogs the curtain squeaks open and your vote is recorded. I have never once worried that my vote was not counted. And I like it that way.
Voters at voting booths, 1945.
Update 11/21/06: A report today said that out of 7,000 "old, gray clunker" voting machines city wide in New York, only 9 broke down on election day. Compare that with 15.4% of computer touch machine booths nationwide that failed to count votes at least some of the time.
Labels: Computers, History, New Yorkana, Politics
